Jog 1.77 mi on 6/22/15 14.02 pace

Today has been 3 months since my injury and I’m getting back into it. Started today with a light jog/walk on my usual path of Rave. Round trip was less than 2 miles, but I was only shooting for a mile and a half at a 15 minute pace, so I actually was faster on both.

No earphones or music because I didn’t want the distractions. Was trying to run on the “palms” of my feet instead of the heels or outside edge where I usually wear down the shoes. Kept feeling it on the inside of my instep.

I think i may take a trip to the shoe store and get some opinions. Now that I’m not 65 pounds overweight (only 15!) I think that they will talk to me instead of being so rude.

Hard to “forgive” them, but it was probably all in my head since I felt so weird walking into a running store when i obviously was big.

Had a great weekend, Rode bikes at Chatauqua Lake – about 30 miles on Saturday. Thursday got 18 miles in. Weekend before did 50. I’m going to try to ride tomorrow and also on Thursday.

Run on Weds and Friday mornings if possible. When I say run, I mean light jog. All of this is holding back just trying to build up some stamina and muscle memory.


  • Dog Days Wine Tour of 65 miles (bike)
  • Sweet Corn Challenge of crazy hills 50 miles (bike)
  • MS150 Buckeye Breakaway 150 miles (bike)
  • Training for September 26 Saturday Akron Marathon Relay 5.8 miles (run)

Funny, the 5,8 miles has me SO MUCH more intimidated than the 150 miles or even 50 sweet corn.

My Fallback Plan to Get Moving Forward Again

I just love the idea of a “Fallback Plan” where I figure out my least difficult forward option to keep the momentum moving forward.

After my piriformis glute problem that has persisted for 3 months now, I’ve had a steady increase in weight (157.2 today) and a steady decline in exercise (only 80% of my 5 mile a day goal over the past 3 months.) I’m still doing a plan, but its more like 3 notches down.

Instead of exercising 5 days a week (2 spinning and 3 bootcamps) I’m more like 3 or 4 days a week with mild physical therapy.

My exercise is spotty. I don’t wake up and put on my exercise clothes, I have been forcing/dragging myself into it.

My eating is too mindless. I’m looking in the fridge and then grabbing something that looks good. At least I’m still mindfully shopping. Lots and lots of veggies. So sometimes the mindless is roasting veggies and snacking on those. Good.

But this post about how not to lose momentum by having a fallback plan that you will do even when the doing’s hard is great.

  • Salad at lunch (I did that yesterday with a lot of spinach in a pita, but I wasn’t interested in the pita.)
  • tuna on cut up veggies
  • cauliflower fest dinner
  • Go to the gym later if I miss my morning time slot. Or even do the routine at home.
  • Leg lifts – body weight squats – lunges – bird dogs – lots of piriformis stretches.

Yesterday was a good day at the gym. I did two rounds of reps of the hard stuff and everything in the right order (dynamic stretching first and static stretching at the end) with tow rounds of “hard” reps in between.

Not so good at the fridge. Breakfast was good, but still hungry after. Lunch was good, but still hungry after.  Dinner wasn’t planned, and turned into a lot of snacking.  Lots of “good” snacking, but not satisfying or feeling like I had a good dinner.

So if I was giving grades: B+ at the gym for exercising (maybe even A-) and a C+ for the eating. Today I’ll work on making my fallback plan for the days that are really tough.

How to Enjoy Parties But Not Go Down the Slope

I can’t stop thinking about the last post.

It sounds like so much deprivation. Which is the enemy of long term maintaining.

But if I start down the slope of eating party food and indulging in party drinks, I know what happens.

Not starting is the only way for me. I’ve tried having “just one” or having just the “special” hors d’oeuvres.

The special ones are not all that special. Fruit with sugar added. Cream cheese that I thought was the low fat kind, wasn’t.

Angel Food cake “fluff” was not with the special weight watcher recipe (and I had thirds! thinking that it was.)

Potlucks, holidays. Birthdays. Grad parties. Networking cocktail after hours events. Weddings. All are challenges for me. But only if I eat.

If I can get my food before I get there. GREAT! I’m not so hungry and resistance doesn’t feel like resistance.

Nervous social situations make me eat as using food as a crutch. I have found if there are shrimp, I can take 2 shrimps, put some cocktail sauce on my plate, eat them and be okay. My plate has their tails and tell tale signs of sauce. And I don’t have to eat any more.

Carrying a dirty plate around when it’s not a sit down is helpful.

But if there are drinks, I can’t shake hands, so I keep the drink to a minimum (water) or don’t do the plate.

At the wedding the week before. I did great. Except our table was closest to the food. And I was so close to the table, I could reach over to the pita chips and hummus. A healthy slippery slope that I slid down. By the end of the night when they were calling for somemores (it was a BBQ) I couldn’t resist.

There was dancing. That’s usually my strategy.  But my piriformis was acting up even from playing cornhole! And I couldn’t stop thinking about the chocolate.

On my way up to the beverage table to get another water, I opened a chocolate bar (reese’s cup large) and ate one.

Tasted like all the other reese’s cups I’ve had in my life.

I resisted the wedding cake and almost all the deserts (ate on small cupcake) but went home with a sugar buzz. And feeling like I didn’t do my resisting best.

Earlier in the afternoon, when I asked for water (alternating wine with water) the server insisted I carry the bottle of water around – I wanted it in my glass just like the people with beer and wine. We had a tugging (opposite) of war. I ended up leaving the bottle, but she wasn’t pleased. Weird. She didn’t make the beer drinkers carry their bottles. or the wine drinkers.  Later, I gave up and just carried around the water bottle. Felt at first like I was screaming “loser/light weight – can’t handle the alcohol”… until enough other people were drinking water.

I find I get mad about people not helping me keep it off. It feels like everyone wants me to add it back on. They, of course, don’t. Most of the people don’t even know me or know that I’ve dropped over 60 pounds and kept off over 50. So why does it still feel like such a personal sabotage that people are doing “to” me?

I rant about a birthday party. A LOVELY birthday party, like it is the devil. A snake. (like eve’s garden.) It really really really feels like it is to me.

Resistance and deprivation are not the way to live.

Endorphins made it all up to me by the end of the night.

But I can describe almost all the evenings out, weddings, parties, family get together’s and fun times with friends with what I’m not eating. I’ve got to get a handle on this or I’ll be back in the overweight category. Already my BMI’s been in the 26 range for almost 6 months. Maybe 9 months. I think it’s the lack of meetings.

I quit weight watchers this month. Yes, after almost 7 years. Oct 2009 to May 2015. Whoops, I guess that is 8 years. Got to find another outlet/meeting that works.

I wasn’t doing anything except taking my money every month. I would track my weight every Tuesday, but the meetings were counter productive. Their snacks were carb/salt. or sugar/salt = another slippery slope.

Enough thoughts for today.

Resisting the Birthday Celebration Cheats

deck_bdayIt’s a beautiful day and I snuck out of work early to meet my friends for a quick birthday celebration. Out on the deck, my buddies are sitting around an umbrella shaded table heaped with birthday bags, colorful table mattes, paper plates and festive balloons and flowers. Birthday cards with funny covers and silly sayings get passed around the table.

Center of attention are the appetizers. So lovely. Obviously hours of work went into their preparation. The food looked  beautiful and appealing. Like out of a magazine.

Then the giant birthday cake… made from scratch.

And a wide choice of wine, beer and other alcoholic beverages served in fun glasses.

How to resist. Ugh. Not only am I hungry (it’s 4:30 pm) but we  (my husband & his/my other friends)  are going bike riding at 6:30, (meaning I need to leave the party by 5:30, to get home, eat, changed and leave in time to get to the parking lot where we will meet.)

So I didn’t drink. That part wasn’t hard. Thank goodness I don’t have much of  a problem with resisting the alcohol or I don’t know what I’d do to try to lose/keep off the weight!!

And I was able to resist the food. They know me pretty well by now. It’ll be 3 years in 60 days from now.

None the less, I get all this:

  • You’re missing out
  • just this once
  • c’mon try some
  • aren’t you going to have any?
  • You are so good

Maybe they didn’t say all of these, but I heard them. The ones they didn’t say,  I heard in my head.

I left after an hour. I was there, but I didn’t feel like I really connected.  Food definitely makes you connect.  Drinking my water while they had beer/wine/etc. felt like deprivation.

This is the 4th celebration this month.  The others were at Panera, our usual coffee hang out… where I can grab a coffee black and not feel as out of place.

You might wonder, why not just have a taste?!  I can’t. Especially when I’m hungry. I want to eat, not nibble.

Sometimes they serve fruit, but there is sugar on it.

Part of it was my clothes. I was in work clothes, coming straight from the office, not the party style.  Part of it was who I sat by, there is one other who is “really good” and usually just drinks water. But she seems not tempted by the treats and there isn’t the usual cajoling to get her to sample the beginning of what I consider the “slippery slope.”   And my head was still in the work projects that I left unfinished.

Next time I need to bring something. But I don’t want to take all the time to prep something when I have to take it to work and then take it to the party. And it would be “healthy” ie not eaten.

Once I got home, heated up my chicken breast, added the veggies and wolfed it down in 3 minutes… hurrying to change clothes, load up my bike, water bottle, cleats, helmet, bike pack etc and hop into the truck to head to the trail. Very  glad I resisted.

The food was just right in my belly.

At 9 pm at the restaurant, after the 22 miles ride, I ordered a spinach salad with dressing on the side.  Tomatoes, eggs, cucumber and a bit of cheese.  YUM!

Woke up to a happy scale on Friday morning!!!

If I didn’t have bike riding on the agenda, I wouldn’t have resisted. At least one… maybe even 2 glasses of wine. And then I can’t resist the food.

I hope they keep inviting me to the party. I hope I don’t make them feel bad by not eating or drinking.  I hope I can keep it up.  When I secumb, I end up trying to get the weight back off for months. (Right now I’m still fighting down a few pounds from the prior weekend potluck.)

Keep the focus. Good nutritious food in the right quantity.  Exercise that doesn’t hurt, but brings out the endorphins.  Restful sleep where I wake up rarring to go!

PS – the 22 miles was strenuous enough I had endorphins floating around until around midnight.  First time I felt my bike ride had been hard enough to feel like a workout.

Going out this morning for another one!!

Steps to Maintaining. So Simple. So Hard.

This PPT webinar talk about how values lead to thought patterns which lead to actions and actions lead to outcomes inspired me to figure out why I’ve been struggling for the months since I hit goal (149 pounds in July 2012) to not gain back  the weight on and off over the past 35 months.

I’m up 10% to 155.3 or 63 pounds lost, 6.3 gained.  I did get all the way down to 143 for a minute, but 147 to 149 is where I want to maintain.

So I spent a few minutes this morning analyzing what I do to keep if off and trying to figure out where my weakness is.

This statement is a “duh” obvious one, but is the fact of the matter:

Keeping weight off is a combination of eating healthy, exercise and enough sleep.

Each element is hard in it’s own way with internal struggles and external struggles. But just setting up some plain old habits and routines for keeping the actions and doing the actions without interruption will keep the end result.

1) Eating Healthy Actions:

  • meal planning
  • shopping
  • meal preparation
  • prep snacks, lunches and pre dinners
  • doing dishes
  • putting away

Feeling good, not feeling cravings. Not making a decision each time I eat.

Hard Part about Eating Healthy

  • going out with friends
  • attending a party/BBQ
  • restaurants
  • treats
  • 3 oclock duldrooms/bored at work

2) Doing Exercise Actions:

  • getting up earlier
  • putting on exercise clothes
  • go to gym
  • take a shower


My friends at gym. Endorphin hormones on the drive home. I actually really like to exercise.  Bike riding with friends is awesome. Hiking is good. Walking the dogs is good (except for the dog hair in my car.)

Hard Part about Exercising

  • Injuries have limited my habits (do my hip exercises every morning right away!)
  • Embarrassed that I can’t do what I used to do
  • Easier to hide at home

3) Getting Enough Sleep Actions:

  • Limit caffeine
  • Go to bed before 10
  • Evening routine
  • Melatonin

Positives: When I get enough sleep, everything in life is easier and happier. Definitely affects my mood.

Hard Part about Getting Enough Sleep

  • Watching TV at night
  • Not going to bed, but falling asleep on the couch
  • Netflixs
  • The “doing one more thing” syndrome
  • Waking up in the middle of the night 3 am ish and not being able to fall asleep again
  • Naps (are they good or bad?… they feel to good to be bad!)

Next post should be, what I’m going to do about the hard parts to make them easier, right? Anyone have any good suggestions for me?

10 Tools I Use to Keep Motivated to Keep the Weight Off

  1. Scale (yes, everyday)
  2. Tape measure (yes, about every month)
  3. Tracking (find a better way. Tracking weight 3 ways, but I need to track food better. Using MyFitnessPal. But I need a paper system.)
  4. Drink Water (add tracking to this. Pretty water bottle. Cucu/Strawberry water)
  5. Skinny Jeans target (add this. I keep hiding my size 8’s so i don’t feel bad. Need to get an outfit front and center.)
  6. BFF (Angie. Margie.gini? via text. )
  7. Specific goal (run/reunion,30 day challenge) & Big picture (dr check ups, health #’s)
  8. Keep a chart of fitness ( daily mile, mapmyrun, strava)
  9. APP (sparkpeople, loseit, myfitnesspal)
  10. pedometer (movband)
  11. rewards (massage?)

Just read this article about how to stay motivated. Most of these I’ve already been using. but going to add in number 11 with a scheduled massage every month, track #4 and put #5 front and center on the ho0k in my closet.

Better! Finally!

Okay, it took 2 months of recovery this time.

I can lie down on my stomach and raise my leg up without it quivering and shaking and falling. So I’ve got my glutes firing in the right order (I think) and have strengthened and retrained my muscles.

In 60 days, I think I only skipped my exercises maybe 4 times when I was really hurting. I didn’t do 2 or 3 sets, only one set, but still, compared to what I do when I’m by myself, I’m really proud of myself for following thru.

Biking: On Sunday I did a 24 mile bike ride with only twinges getting back into the truck or sitting at breakfast maybe 3 times or so.

Diet – food

Not going as well as I’d hoped, but not a disaster either. I started a 30 day challenge on May 5, I’m halfway into it and have not really attended to it. But I’ve done it enough that I’m EXACTLY the same weight this morning as when I started. I’m 2.8 pounds heavier than when I got hurt.

Avoiding Reinjury
I’m going to keep up my warm up and stretching routine before working out and stretching after to keep my glute muscles from getting inhibited.

Sleep with pillow between the knees and don’t cross the knees. Stretch a little (20 seconds) thruout the day.

Change my Running:

To reduce the potential for chronicity, runners with piriformis syndromes should sleep on their side with a pillow folded between their knees, and sit with their knees straight. Because a piriformis syndrome tends to produce low grade discomfort that can go on for months, it is usually possible to continue running with this injury. To reduce strain on the piriformis muscle while running, consider shortening your stride by increasing your cadence 10 percent. Also consider switching to a midfoot strike pattern. By correcting common perpetuating patterns and improving hip strength and flexibility, most piriformis syndromes can easily be resolved in a few months.

You know, I had that low grade discomfort before the big event on 3/21 but just ignored it. I’m not going to ignore it again. When I feel it coming on:

1) go get a massage
2) do the 3 part routine of roller, side-to-side, standing out to side warm up. Then cat/cow, hydrants, straight backs, squats, lunges, bird dogs and mountain climbers. Then the side plank, 90 degree knee, twist to back, crossed leg standing and forward fold. First two parts particularly before a workout and the last one after.
3) ice, ice, ice. then heat for blood flow.

Complex Carbs, Lean Protein and the Right Fats

Glute Updated and Avoiding Trigger Foods from a Friend

Today marks the 6th week since I’ve been without the butt pain. While it is MUCH MUCH better, I still don’t dare go back to my much loved T/Th/Sat HIIT workouts. I still have trouble doing 15 squats and the 15 hydrants and worry about doing the lunges.

On Thursday night I rode 15 miles on my bike. Warmed up before hand and did a bit of stretching afterwards. It’s awkward getting on the ground and doing the warm up/stretching afterward. I’ve got to “get over it” because I know that is a key to getting/keeping my glutes working right and not straining the piriformus muscle.

Yesterday was a food struggle. I’m doing the 30 day challenge for May. Did okay early on. Morning of fried eggs, no toast. Fruit at the Panera breakfast (but of course my well intentioned friend had put at least 1/4 cup of sugar on the fruit. For some reason she thinks it’s not sweet enough.

On the way to the office stopped at the grocery store, bought almonds, berries and sweet potato. Ate berries and almonds but forgot the S.W. in the car. So I ate too many almonds, resulting in a gain this morning. You really shouldn’t have them as a MEAL!

But about 3 pm (my worst time of day!) a coworker walks in to wish all of us “HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY”. So nice. But with chocolate. No thanks I say. Oh come on she said. No, really, I’m trying to quit. Oh come on it’s dark chocolate! she says. So I take it. But I’m mad. Between her chocolate and her office mate’s cookies it’s always full of sweets and carbs. I keep bringing in fruit and nuts, but I have a tough time controlling the environment. When I came home, I made gluten free pasta, not too much and ate it with sockaroni sauce. Not too bad, but too much salt and sugar in a prepared sauce. Too tired to cook my own. and I added parmasain cheese. Also not part of the 30 day challenge. So I’m up 1.3 on the scale today.

I ended up taking the chocolate back into the kitchen and out of my office. But I noticed she left a pile of the chocolate in the front conference room about 10 steps in front of me. I think I’ll move them back to the kitchen on Monday.

Otherwise, they will live in my head all day until I unwrap one (then another and another and another) at about 3 pm when my willpower weakens and the sugar / caffeine craving is the strongest.

she doesn’t know my struggle. And I don’t feel like telling her. I’ve tried. She doesn’t listen. She’s just offended I won’t take her gift. Maybe you think I should just take it and then say thankyou. And then when she leaves the room, throw it in the trash. But there is something psychological inside my head about taking it and saying thank you that is accepting it. I have the hardest time accepting a sweet/treat something and then throwing it away. If I don’t take it, it’s not mine. So it’s much easier to give away, throw away or put back. But as soon as I take it and say thank you. UGH!

People sometimes put the cookies and sweets in the freezer. On a really bad day (bad client call and 3 pm and tired with maybe a cold layered on top) I really can’t resist. None of use really “needs” the cookies, but they show up. Maybe in the OLDEN days, donuts/cookies/chocolate were a good gift. But I look at it like a huge trigger food for me. And most of the people who give it to me are not trying to get healthy, watch their weight, overcome this particular hurdle so they look at me like I have 2 heads.

I usually keep a can of tuna packed in water in my desk. Nothing like a bunch of protein to get me thru a tough afternoon.

Any body have good strategies for getting thru the 3 pm witching hour? Or how to not accept the trigger food that will haunt me until I eat it?

Day 32 and still sitting on ice

Well, my piriformis pain is “better” but still acting up. I’m sleeping with a pillow under my thigh or between my knees when I’m on my side. I’m doing my 1/2 hour to 40 minutes of physical therapy type exercises. I’m doing ice 20 minutes a day for 3 times. I’m trying not to do the things that make it worse (sitting for more than 30 minutes at a time.)

But still it persists.

I wanted to do the Raccoon Run on Sunday. (It was so fun last year.) I’m thinking of walking it, but you know, there are lots of hills and my gut says “Mistake. Don’t do it.” even though my heart says “c’mon, it won’t be that bad.” and my head says “Are you nuts! You’re having trouble going from the car to the house!”

Isn’t it weird how I have 3 parts of me with “distinct” voices. I like to listen to my heart (eternal optimist) over my gut (always the worrier) or my head (just the facts ma’m.) It’s my heart that gets me thru the tough stuff!!!